A friend once told me that my humor can be divided like a pie-chart.
“30% of the time you’re actually pretty funny,” he explained. “But the other seventy, we either don’t know what the hell you’re talking about or you just sound like an idiot.”
Actually, he isn’t my friend. He is an asshole, and he makes it his mission in life to offend as many people as possible each day. Colin is the typical teenage boy: he is constantly torn between farting and humping everything that moves, and he harbors a strange obsession for Spongebob Squarepants. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him in anything dressier than his old high school soccer jersey and his favorite red plaid pajama pants. His youthful attire and unfortunately persistent acne betray him as a young man in the unforgiving throes of his later teenage years, but his thick neck and rapidly defined jaw promise that he is likely to grow into a very handsome looking gentleman. If only he weren’t such a damn prick.
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